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Only Everything

by Everything in Pen

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    Cover art by Chris Koehler with selected lyrics from "Only Everythingl" printed on 8.5 x 11" heavy stock matte paper, signed by both artists

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1.
I fell in love in the bookstore I did not know that it wasn't with him He seemed oh so generous That I forgot that he got it all for free Didn't mind that the covers were missing Didn't mind that he came home so late I fell in love with the books that he brought me He fell in love with someone else I'm turning the pages tonight I am turning the pages tonight I fell in love in the bookstore I did not know that it wasn't with him But after hours of television I see he does not like to read But he had nodded in all the right places He pulled my favorite authors off the shelf I know it was love in the bookstore that day For the rest I was kidding myself I'm turning the pages tonight I am turning the pages tonight I'll be turning the pages tonight
2.
Ben 04:49
He says pleased to meet you ma'am Sticks out his hand It was the biggest hand I ever He was the biggest man I knew He pulled out my chair I'm sure I scowled I can take care of myself I have been pulling chair just fine But I didn't know what he already knew Moments are far too few When we can be kind to each other I was hanging out He stayed on the sides We were both holding time Could we be kind to each other in the waiting? Well, I can't believe you're standing here Where else would I be? It is the start of the season He says listen to everything that that girl says She's one of the ones who care And I wouldn't be here without her But I didn't know what he already knew Moments are far too few When we can be kind to each other I was moving on He still held the line I never thought to say goodbye Could we be kind to each other in the losing? He says I don't even like this game I'll play it anyway there's people here I love And you don't know just how lucky you have been You can be anything and choosing is not a burden Why do you act like it is? I would give anything But I didn't know what he already knew Moments are far too few When we can be kind to each other I was moving on He still held the line I never thought to say goodbye Could we be kind to each other in the losing?
3.
We could stay small We could be small We could be everything we imagine We could be small above it all Where we could orchestrate our surroundings But sooner or later I will have to run away And sooner than later You will be too small to see So is this love? Let's call it love Cause it can have so many dimensions And if this love might be enough Then we should raise our expectations Cause sooner or later I will have to run away And sooner than later You will be too small to see Sooner or later I will have to run away And sooner than later You will be too small to see This will be too small to see I will be too small to see
4.
And it seems you've learned these lessons to perfection Any pretense every cost They're all smiles every time you walk into the room Where everyone knows everyone and nothing is enough When you say that you've learned everything you know from me i can't hear that as a complement I'd rather paint this story in every shade of black and white Than admit I saw it coming Than to know i could prevent it Won't say goodbye to someone who doesn't know I'm leaving Won't wait around watching shadows climb the walls Not trying to change your ways You can keep all your conversations I'm not Cassandra Won't be Sisyphus And if I've been your silent partner In your silent game of everything's ok I've never been the kind of person to give up That's my failing That's my failing So ask me one more time to tell you all about my day Cross me off your list See I will make it so much harder than it really is You're exactly who you've always been and precisely who you'll be Won't say goodbye to someone who doesn't know I'm leaving Won't wait around watching shadows climb the walls Not trying to change your ways You can keep all your conversations I'm not Cassandra Won't be Sisyphus
5.
There weren't any signs There was not a time When I could get my things and get ready It came in a flash And it was not a dream All that I knew started fading There weren't any signs There was not a time When I could get my things and get ready It came in a flash And it was not a dream All that I knew started fading Even in the darkest light there's a story to be told What remains when there's nothing left Only everything Only everything There weren't any signs There was not a time When I could see it's here, come get it It felt like a flash And it was not a dream All that I knew started fading Even in the darkest light there's a story to be told What remains when there's nothing left Only everything Only everything
6.
Cause it's a circle not a line I hate to break it to you honey But you've always been yourself all of this time You think that you'll be going backwards but you're still on course Set your path and settle back It's just a matter of time When it's a circle not a line
7.
I don't think you want the truth from me Though it's the truth for which you ask You assume whatever truth I bring It's gonna make you feel less bad What's so wrong with feeling bad at least When something hard is going on? What's so hard with feeling wrong at least When you have done somebody wrong? I can't claim to understand the ways of these heart-broken men They're crying over that one And they're hanging out with their new other They've got friends of friends And just in case and maybe whens Backup plans for backup plans And I wonder what letter I've been I agree with her She should have left you long ago There isn't any pretty way to say You don't deserve her love Why would you want to erase the gift Of everything you're going through? When you just keep moving on like this Don't you see what that does to you? What's so wrong with feeling sad at least If she has meant something to you? You're expecting so much more from me Than I am ever gonna tell I can't claim to understand the ways of these heart-broken men Who're crying over that one And they're hanging out with their new other They've got friends of friends And just in case and maybe whens Back up plans for back up plans And I wonder what letter I've been I agree with her She should have left you long ago There isn't any pretty way to say You don't deserve her love
8.
Yes I know it's getting better You don't have to tell me Just because it's getting better Doesn't mean it's as it should be Is it ever as it should be? Maybe this is the new should be for me You don't have to tell me Yes I know that it's still harder You don't have to tell me Just because it is still harder Doesn't mean I'm learning anything These lessons stay a mystery Misunderstanding everything I see You don't have to tell me You don't have to tell me you would die if you were me You don't have to say anything but I need you to let me Yes I know that it seems fine now You don't have to tell me Just because it's seeming fine now Doesn't mean this night won't tear me down I won't take this for that much longer Seconds and forever are the same You don't have to tell me Yes I know I cannot give up You don't have to tell me Just because I will not give up Doesn't mean this is a test of wills And if I try harder than I will Fix everything that will not work for me You don't have to tell me You don't have to tell me
9.
Maybe 04:13
I don't know what to do with them They keep coming They keep coming in I could count them classify them No one's coming No one's coming in Maybe some memories Are more than anyone should bear Sweep up this roadside I'll keep them safe I'll keep them It must be an instinct that we all have Something happened Something happened there Count the headlights count the streetlights Count the signs They'll all notice But they can't know what happened to get us here Maybe some memories Are more than anyone should bear Sweep up this roadside I'll keep them safe I'll keep them Cause accidents breed accidents On that we can agree And I swear I'll touch all of their names You won't have to And I won't have to know Maybe some memories Are more than anyone should bear Sweep up this roadside I'll keep them safe I'll keep them I'll keep them Safe.
10.
I can't put my finger on it But everything is alright I'm taking no for an answer And everything is alright If there's a moon I don't see it There are no stars I don't need you to believe it But everything is alright Even if it isn't Even if it isn't Even if it isn't I'm hearing all your suggestions Everything is alright Some things defy explanation Everything is alright See I've had to work so much harder than this To get what I want There is no point in resisting Everything is alright So I am not taking more questions Everything is alright See I didn't think I would feel this But everything is alright Even if it isn't Even if it isn't Even if it isn't I can't put my finger on it but everything is alright I'm taking no for an answer Everything is alright I can't put my finger on it but everything is alright I'm taking no for an answer And everything is alright Everything is alright Everything is alright Everything is alright

about

Even in the darkest light, there's a story to be told

credits

released November 25, 2017

All songs by Elizabeth Hubbard

Elizabeth Hubbard: vocals, acoustic guitar, keys, bass
Alexi Glickman: electric guitar, bass, piano, keys, drums, percussion, backing vocals, ice castle

Produced by Alexi Glickman
Recorded at Magic West, Mill Valley, CA
Mastered by Kenny Woods

Album Art and Design by Chris Koehler

Everything in Pen thanks
Alexi
Vernon, Chris
the Hubbard-Archambault-Frank-Roggeveens
Walter, Helen, Hazel, Harry
Sarah, Mike, Ronen, Carnelius, Brian, Denise, Marlowe, Lynn, Herb, Vicki, Matt, Gigi, Adrian, Ariana, Karen
Ben Huff
Richard Yates, Terry Tempest Williams, Anna Lyndsey, Sonali Deraniyagala
and all the many healers who have crossed my path

For Harry
Every moment has a song

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Everything in Pen San Francisco

Combining the pop sensibility of Big Star and narrative observations of Jonathan Richman and Aimee Mann, Everything in Pen’s songs cover many topics---war criminals, sexism, and Dave Eggers--through her unique lens as an obsessive reader. She sings the things you won’t say aloud, of the foolishness, the hopefulness and the almost unbearable humanness of us all. ... more

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